As someone who just graduated college I get asked a lot about what I am doing in life. Do I have a 9-5 job? Do I want one? am I trying to be successful? what goals in life do I have? These questions led me to think about success.
What is success?
I am constantly grappling with that question; what is success?
Is it making lots of money?
Is it being happy?
Is it stability?
buying a house?
traveling the world?
What is success?
If you are reading this post you are beyond the need to find food, water, and shelter. Now, we all have to find out what makes us content with life. We are beyond survival mode, but we worry about the abstract purpose of life. I have been writing many pros and cons lists of different types of lifestyles and jobs. I hear the business women lament she didn't spend enough time raising her daughter, I hear the stay-at-home mom lament she doesn't feel she has accomplished much. There is always value in what you don't have, but there is more value in what you do have. Enjoy the life you are living. Everyone will have some losses in life, but you can have more gains if you set values. Don't try to decide what you want for the rest of you life in black and white decisions. That is to overwhelming and stressful. Quantify what you value as success and start making decisions to fulfill those values.
Make a list
Write down and put a value on everything in life. Every person values things differently. Try to look inside and see what you value the most. My values are constantly fluctuating and that is expected throughout life, but write down what you value right now. I think Michelle Obama has a great quote about success: "Whether you come from a council estate or a country estate, your success will be determined by your own confidence and fortitude." The trick is to decide where you want to place your confidence and fortitude. You can help decide where you want to take the next step by creating a list of your values. Your path might change multiple times... just keep walking.
Be prepared your list will change
Right now I am a single 26-year-old and I am financially independent. However, I have very little expenses, so my income doesn't need to be very large to cover my expenses. That will change when I get married, have a house, a dog and kids... My list for what I value will change slightly, so I must be open to re-writing a list of life goals and values every five years.
So, what do you want to be when you grow up?
Don't always feel you need a black and white answer to that question. It might be a questions that has ideas and concepts not specific roles. If you want to be a doctor, that is a specific role. If you want to increase opportunities for blacks that is much more abstract. I am listening to the book Becoming by Michelle Obama on Audible. I feel I can connect to her struggle in her young adult years between checking a check list and following her passion. One guaranteed a good salary, the other did not. When she was making the decision to pursue her passion she has no idea she would be the First Lady of the United States of America for eight years. Maybe, you would rather have a job with great financial returns so you can have wonderful vacations. Maybe, you want to create some of both. There are so many remote opportunities with how fast and available our internet is, but the only way to find these jobs your really want is to write down what you currently value.
If you are reading this blog you have the ability to decide where to push your confidence and fortitude. Make a list and every time an opportunity arrives and evaluate it compared to your values.
Jamie "MoCrazy" Crane-Mauzy
Talk Show Host- Life Gets MoCrazy on the Brain Injury Radio Network